Oh, jet fuel. Thou rare afterthought, nay, of no thought at least from those who traverse upon silvered wings to dizzying heights, blown by the breath of dawn itself, never considering, never thanking the oily black lifeblood which maintains a peaceful peregrination through the clouds.

But, soft! What information through yonder window breaks (but not really because the plane has tempered glass windows pressurized perfectly, huzzah)? What idea has planted in the garden of mine mind, ready to bloom and as petals on the wind, spread its facts and figures far and wide?

Dost thou comprehend the differences between regular fuel and the fuel of the jet? Nay? Let me count and share the ways.

To pump, perchance to dream.

1. As I am a slave to the muse of the written word, so too is jet-fuel encumbered by the most stringent requirements- The fuel of flight must meet the expectations and fancies of the highest flash points, meaning that unlike burning passions of forbidden love, or standard gasoline, jet-fuel mustn’t ignite quite so easily. So too, like a sprite who’s main employ is to bring about the change of seasons and usher in speckled sunlight as a harbinger of spring, jetfuel must resist the temptation to chill, as it keeps a lowly freeze point.

“We are the Catalytic Converters and we are ready to rocketh.”

2. Jet fuel is doomed to roam around lost and afraid, alone in its journey through the plane engine, cursed to isolation and increased pollution. Oh cruel fate, thou wretched fiend who allows regular fuel to prance hither and yon through catalytic converters (I calleth dibs on the band name). How art thou so cruelly discerning?

3. Like the fateful hero Romeo, lead hath been banished from more typical sources of fuel, however, methinks the plane engine would protest too much, as lead based components offer vital lubrication that despite best efforts, can be sought only in lead-based components. Lead, thorn in the side of the fuselage, you poisonous necessity of ascension. My kingdom for a lead alternative!

actual deleted scene

4. Coming from such depths of the past, most assume that I, a historic lover of the arts did not dabble in the vast, spectacular world of the sciences. However, it is through such a dance with the scientific mind over the course of my life, that I (and a lil character I like to call Mercurtio) were able to call upon the power of the smallest of metaphors- with use of the word “atom”: Drawn with a team of little atomi / Over men’s noses as they lie asleep. Atoms are indeed the smallest fundamentals of life, and so too of jet fuel. Gasoline is as light as the remnants of a dream gone too soon on the whispered breath of a sigh, but then jet-fuel is as heavy as the yoke of exception and the cavernous devastation of fickle love. Heavier, I’m trying to say that jetfuel is heavier, it literally has more atoms, it’s more like kerosene. Wait, would I know what kerosene is? Anyone? I’m a playwright, what do you people want from me?

Bottom line, unlike Lady MacBeth and ruthless ambition, these two fuels do not mix. Heed this warning:

For never was there a tale of more woe, than that of when you put jet-fuel in your car, and it wouldn’t go.